Picnic in the Hall (Anthony)

[Anthony Price]

Anthony's eyes stayed on hers. He didn't like the subject period. And he didn't much trust her. Though trust was a difficult thing to earn with him. And when it was broken it was really hard to get it back. But it was really hard to earn in the first place. And even harder for people in authoritative positions such as the one she held. Which made him trust her less then he trust everyone else if that was possible.

Then she was trying to make an agreement with him. Something he was all to familiar with. No one ever did something just to benefit someone else. There was always something in it for them too. He looked down at his lap taking a few moments to consider his answer to her. Why didn't people like the subject. Well he couldn't speak for everyone else. But he supposed he could speak for himself. "Well .. I can't speak for every one. But answer number one would be no one likes it just because its boring. And number two is for me .. The past is something I'd like to forget. So history even someone else's is part of the past. Reliving stuff .. Most of us don't want to relive things." He didn't want to relive what had broke him.

[rilieycox]

Riley tried not to let the smile slip from her face. Well that was a telling answer. Her first reaction was wanting to hug the poor kid. She didn't know what he'd gone through, but chances were high that it wasn't good. She of course resisted the urge. First off, Anthony didn't strike her as the hugging type. And secondly, accosting students, even if it was just to give them a comforting hug, was probably frowned upon. So instead, she busied her hands, writing out an answer to the first question on the paper. Probably not the most effective way of teaching him, but maybe he'd read over it later and it would stick. And more importantly, a deal was a deal.

“ That is true. I never thought of it like that.” She said, her attention on the paper as she wrote. “ I always saw it as inspirational, learning about all these people and things that changed the world. Take the French Revolution again and the man who you could say started it all. At the time, who would have thought that someone who was so looked down on, ostracized, who many called a criminal, would start something that is still having a effect on our world? Shows that big things come from everywhere, that when someone is amazing, when someone has a purpose, anything is possible. You know what I mean? She looked back to him with a small smile But then again, I'm a huge nerd, so maybe I'm just reading into it too much[/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony watched her fill in the first answer on his paper. He didn't think she would answer the questions for him. But he wasn't going to complain if it helped him pass her class. But again she was talking about someone he had no idea who, who started the french revolution. War was war to him. None if it was good. People died. Pointless to fight in his opinion.

"For me .. War is War .. Its all the same. No good comes out of war. Just people dying and families losing people they love." He wasn't necessarily speaking about people in the military. People fight wars all the time. He was more familiar with mob wars. And he lost people he loved to one of those. His life might have turned out different had he not lost them. That day everything changed.

[rilieycox]

Riley smiled a little, well, they may be disagreeing, and he may not be picking up anything about the subject, but the two of them had officially started a debate. She wanted to pat herself on the back, it wasn't her exact goal, and she had the feeling they weren't really thinking the about the same thing, but he was thinking, and making rational arguments. And that counted for a lot in her books. Maybe it would start here, and next thing she knew, he'd be starting debates in class. She put the paper down, angling to face him more.

“ That is a fair point. War isn't pretty. But you have to consider a larger picture. War makes things possible for us. Democracy, freedom, civil rights. The fact that I am able to sit here, a woman, and be able to teach, it's all the result of some kind of 'war'. You have to have too sides to everything, you can’t have light without darkness, good, without evil. Its the same, you can't have 'peace' without 'war.' ” she said with a small shrug [/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony watched her put his paper down and and turn towards him. She seemed so excited about what he'd said. Like having him argue this with her was some sort of fun. But really she'd never seen his world. The real world. The one where one mistake got you killed. He couldn't ever go back there. Not after spending time at this school. If he'd went to prison it would have been a different story. That made you tough. This place was a 'pansey' move to put it lightly. And he'd die going back to the people of that world.

"Look you really just don't understand. You're so .. Niave. You're caught up in your little world of history you don't see the real world. The world that surrounds the rest of us kids. Maybe you would have a better time getting your students interested in your stupid subject if you really understood where we come from. But a goody goody girl like you probably won't ever understand." The look on his face read a little bit of anger. She really would never know. And for that she'd never really earn the trust of her kids. Not his or any one else's.

[rilieycox]

Riley watched him as he spoke, seeing the anger on his face. She smiled, shaking her head with a small sigh, “ You're right Anthony. I am naive. And in a lot of ways, I could never, ever truly understand what you, or any of the students here have gone through. But don't assume I don't know what the real world looks like., I live here too. I know. ” She kept her eyes on his as she spoke “ I know there's darkness and ugliness. But I also know that there is beauty in the world too. I'm sure you understand that as well, not everything is so terrible.”

She rested her chin in her hands, her look contemplative. “ I want to understand you Anthony. I truly do. I could just teach history, and let the chips fall where they may, after all, it's not my job to see that you leave this school and move onto bigger and better things. That's up to you. I don't need to worry about if you pass or fail. But what good is that? What I want to do is help you, help all my students, reach their potential. Maybe I don't know what is was like for you before you came to Blackwoods, but I want to be able to help steer you towards what it could be when you leave.” She smiled “ It's alright, you can tell me to eff off, and that you don't trust me, won't be the first time I've heard it today. [/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony listened to her speak. This time she had a lot of words. She had started off by telling him he was right. Not a lot of teachers ever said to the students. Least of all him specifically. He had observed other teachers. Their noses stuck in the air or they had simply just given up on them like the rest of the world. And so he just sort of assumed she was that way too. Maybe it was unfair. But people always assumed he was a criminal because of what he'd done. When really deep down he had just been scared, and then taken off guard. And sure maybe some of his words to her were unfair. But he'd let some of his temper boil over.

"There's no beauty in the world I come from. And I sure as hell have nothing to go back to there. I don't really have anything to go to once I get released from here. No college is going to take me and even if they did I'm not skilled in anything but selling drugs and shooting a gun. Who wants a convicted felon for an employee or a student." She had to see that he was right. There was no school out there that took people with records like his so there was really no point in trying to do well to steer his lif in a better direction, because there was no better direction. And he had no one to blame for the mess in his life but himself.

[rilieycox]

Riley shrugged “ 'Your' world out there is the same world as in here. It's all the same. Maybe you can't think of anything in your life right now that's beautiful, but you will find something eventually, I am completely sure about that.” she nodded, smiling slightly. “ Maybe that sounds cheesy, but trust me, this is where my older age come in handy. I know you will.”

She picked back up the paper “ As for after school, you can't sell yourself short Anthony. You're a bright boy. If you applied yourself, I'm sure your marks would improve. I can help with history, and arrange for peer tutoring if you have any other subjects you need some extra help in. If university is something you are interested in, that is more than possible. You were tried as a juvenile, no college will see what you're here for, no employers is legally allowed to discriminate against you because of your record. True, it may not be as easy for you as someone else, but you're already used to having things tougher than most. If anyone can persevere through that, it should be someone like you. You're past made you who you are, but it doesn't define you. ” she nodded[/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony frowned some. She still didn't get it. He wasn't convicted of just some small petty crime like stealing or burning down something or habitual drug use. He was convicted of attempted murder. Everyone see's that. On top of that he was trying to kill a cop. She didn't understand how badly he had ruined his life. How disappointed his parents would be if they were around to see this. Somehow .. Or Someone was looking out for him, and he got sent here instead of prison. But what came after here was a fourty hour job that didn't pay enough to support him and his family.

"I still don't think you get it. I'm here for trying to kill a cop. It was in the paper and the news it wasn't just some petty little crime. I tried to take away someone else's life to keep myself from getting into trouble. Not the best idea I suppose. Right? But see .. any college worth going to won't take me. And even if they did how would I pay for it. Federal grants won't help cause of that. And my sister got my inheritance pushed back to 25 so no money that way either. Did you know I have a baby on the way?" His eyes looked over to hers. There he said it, out loud for the first time to someone other then Pixel. It felt good to tell someone else. But his heart beat was racing, hoping now she wouldn't go and tell other people.

[rilieycox]

Riley was still trying to get her thoughts organized into a positive spin after he’d revealed why he’d been sent to Blackwood’s, when Anthony hit her with the fact that he was going to be a father. She looked at him, shocked. Her heart went out to him, on top of everything, he was being forced to deal with this as well? She refused to believe it was strictly his fault that he was in Blackwoods, she refused to believe any of the kids were solely to blame for their situation. They were victims of their environment, and she was certain that if any of them had the childhood and life she’d had, they would have made different choices. The fact that a few bad decisions lead this poor teenage boy to think that his life was almost certainly over, that he had nothing left to offer the world, it broke her. And on top of that, he was bringing a child into the world, and had that whole other level of stress added to his plate.

Riley watched him looking at her, and firmed her resolve. Regardless of what he’d done in the past, right now he was a scared child, and like hell she was going to let him shoulder that on his own. Maybe he wasn’t technically her responsibility, but she felt a duty to all the students in BAD, whether or not they were a designated level two. Strictly speaking, this was probably the kind of information that should be passed along to the headmaster, but that wasn’t a thought that even entered her mind, she wouldn’t even imagine breaking his confidence.

She again resisted the urge to hug the poor child, and instead, reached out and put her hand on his shoulder, squeezing comfortingly, searching for the right words to say. Finally she took a deep breath. “ Anthony, that is scary as hell for you. But it’s also so amazing, that you are going to bring another life into the world. ” she paused “ I can’t lie, it probably won’t be easy. But it is possible. You are a good kid. I don’t care what put you in here, I don’t care what you did. You are a good kid who wants to better himself. I will make it happen. Whatever you need, whether it’s something personal, or helping you get into a college, or a trade, or whatever. You’ve got someone on your side.” she nodded, not sure what she could do exactly, but she’d decided to take him under her wing and would fight tooth and nail for him.[/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony watched her while she took in all the information he'd just let out. He wasn't sure why he was even doing it. He hated the teachers here. But this one .. She was trying to help him, he just .. didn't believe she would really want to help him. He didn't really believe anyone did. It was just the way he'd grown up. No one helped you just cause. Not the way Riley was suggesting. He wasn't scared about bringing this baby into the world with Pixel. Cause he had Pixel. What he was scared of was bringing this baby into his world. The nasty ugly would he just couldn't seem to escape. He didn't want his baby to grow up in this place.

"I'm not scared of having this baby. I'm scared of where I'm having this baby. And how I'm going to support it and Pixel. We love each other, raising this baby should be a piece of cake. But here .. its no place to raise a kid. But I'm not giving up my kid for someone else to raise. I don't trust anyone else to do it. I've seen the way most parents screw their kids up .. I'm not handing my baby over to someone so they can screw it up." Basically he was making it known to her that he wasn't going to give the child up to someone no matter how much trouble he got in for it. They'd have to kill him before he let someone take his baby away from him.

[rilieycox]

Riley smiled a little, in spite of herself. Sure, it was not ideal, but the conviction he had already that he was keeping his child warmed her heart. Who said the kids here were bad? How many so called ‘well adjusted’ teenage boys would have shirked their responsibility the first chance they got? This just strengthened her belief that you had to look beyond someone’s circumstance to see what kind of person they were. How many people would just assume a boy like Anthony was trouble and be done with him? It was disgusting.

Riley dropped her hand from his shoulder and shook her head “ I would never presume you wanted to give up your child. That’s the kind of decision that only you and.. Pixel?.. could make.” She smiled at him “ I’m incredibly proud of you Anthony, one, you are being so brave. I don’t know that I could have accepted that I was having a child in High School, and as you already pointed out, my life was a lot different than yours. And secondly, you are worried not about yourself, but about the people that you love. That shows a maturity that a lot of adults haven’t reached yet.” She frowned slightly, he had a point about the environment, it wasn’t the best place to bring in a child, nor was she sure what the school’s policy on such things would be. And, unless she was mistaken, Pixel, like him, was only a sophomore, they still had three years before they were out of Blackwoods.

She looked back to him “ I’m not going to lie, I don’t know how this situation will work out. But, if you and Pixel want to keep your child, then you have my word Anthony, I will do everything in my power to make sure that happens.” She nodded. “ As for more practical matters, have you told anyone else? How far along is Pixel? She’ll need to see a doctor soon enough. Have tests, get vitamins. She’ll need a different uniform{/color]” Riley continued on, more thinking out loud at this point than really speaking to Anthony.[/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony listened to her. She had told him he was brave and that she was proud of him. Those hadn't been words mentioned to him in a long time. He never thought he'd hear them. He didn't think she had any reason to be proud, and he didn't think he was all that brave either. But that was just him. He supposed there was no way to make her see him the way he saw himself. Also that he was mature and all that. Again he didn't see that. If he was he probably wouldn't be here.

When she started asking questions he swallowed and looked down at the floor. "We haven't told any one yet. We're scared of what the headmaster might say or do. Probably expel us or something like that. And if that's the case off to prison I go for a long time. And I don't want that. I don't want to be away from them" He took in a breath and looked to Riley. "So no .. We haven't told anyone."

[rilieycox]

Riley let out a huff of breath and ran her fingers through her hair, pushing the long strands back from her face. She didn't want to admit it, but there was a chance he was right about the headmaster. Riley wasn't sure what his reaction would be, but she was afraid it wouldn't be good. And on top of loosing the child, there would be nowhere else for Anthony to go. And despite what cops and judges may argue, she didn't think the boy deserved to be in a prison. None of the students did. She couldn't let that happen to him. It simply wasn't right, and she would not stand by. She didn't think she had much sway here, she was too new, other than being a voice on their side, and threatening to tender her resignation, she wasn't sure what she could bring to the table to sway the headmaster. But she would come up with something.

“ That won't happen Anthony, I won't let it. she said emphatically. “ But you need to tell sooner rather than later. Pixel needs to see a doctor, this is all a moot point if she looses the baby. You two need to think of making a point to see Dr. Sjodin, at the very least, so you can be sure everything id ok with the pregnancy.”[/size]

[Anthony Price]

Anthony nodded listening to her. She said she wouldn't let anything bad happen. But he didn't much trust her. She didn't have the final say on stuff like that. So he didn't trust her. He wouldn't trust her to keep a promise like that or any promise at all. He wasn't really sure why he'd told her anything about Pixels pregnancy. His dark blue eyes looked to hers. His were full of different emotions. But steady.

"Don't take it personally if I don't believe you. First off I don't really know why I told you any of that. Doesn't mean I trust anything that you say. Second you don't have the final say in what happens so sorry I'm not going to hold my breath that you'll follow through on any of those promises." His eyes then moved from hers back down to the paper of his she was still holding. He wouldn't be surprised if she went and told someone after they finished here.