Post by rainee on Aug 7, 2011 18:37:22 GMT -6
BENJAMIN TRAVIS CORMACK
FULL NAME: Benjamin Travis Cormack
BIRTHDATE: April 13, 1981
AGE: 31
SUBJECT: Art -- whichever's open
YEARS TEACHING: 5
YEARS AT BLACKWOOD: About a year
HEALTH CONDITIONS: None
ADDITIONAL:
“Why did you decide to go into teaching?”
I don't know really, I really love art, and architecture, sculpting (rarely though). I guess after everything that's happened I really needed a change in my life. Working with younger people and in ways telling them and allowing them to express themselves in different ways, drawing, painting, sculpting etc.
“What can you offer the school?”
What can I offer? Hm, well... how to answer this. I don't know really.. I can offer a lot of different things, and maybe nothing. I know I would love to help these kids do things in different ways, and that not all drugs and alcohol can solve your problems. I mean, if that's what I did with everything that's happened to me.. I'd probably be living out on the street. But I channeled a lot of it, into architecture, and the piano.
“Why do you want to work with troubled youth?”
Like I've said, they might need,... I don't know. I don't wanna sound cheesy, but they might need attention. Help, or other ways to take out whatever it is they are feeling. I sound pretty lame. Haha, but I honestly don't think I am, I can be a cool guy/teach person, I'm no asshole teacher or anything like that. I've learned to live life.. and not be such an ass.. because you can lose people that you really care about, anytime, anywhere, without knowing it. And that's probably how they feel, like they were dumped here, and they aren't wanted. I just want to help show them that there is another way.
“How long have you been teaching? What subjects have you taught? Where was the last place you taught?”
5 years, BUT I've only been subbing, I haven't actually had my own permanent class. And the last school I taught at was Cassadaga High
“How do you project yourself to students? How do you think your coworkers will see you? How do you see yourself?”
I tend to show myself as.. someone who cares, but I won't push too hard, because most kids won't try if you keep pushing, well maybe some of them,.. maybe. I'm not quite sure how I show who I am to everyone, it's different a lot, especially since I haven't stayed in one place very long. I've moved around a bit, and haven't found a steady ground. But I hope they'll see me as someone who would really like to help, and I would really try to do what I can to get these kids to see who they could be, and who they really are. I'm not quite sure I can DO all of that, but that's what I plan on trying to do. I see myself as someone who will keep trying with these kids, and do my best to stick with it.
“What is the worst decision you have made during your teaching career?”
Worst decision I made? Hm,.. well.. I'm not quite sure, since I would only be ina classroom for maybe... at most a week at a time. But um, I don't quite think I've made any major mistakes. To be honest.
“Tell me a little about your life before coming to B.A.D.”
Well I grew up in Salem, Oregon. Until High school anyways, which was when my family and I decided to move here. I'll start from the beginning. In elementary school, things were all fine and dandy as all things are when you're that young. I had a best friend his name was Thomas Anderson, we were always together, almost every day after school he would come over and we'd play in my back yard, possibly pretending to be soldiers in the military, to superheroes saving the world, and also...pretending to be the walking dead. Haha oh man, my mom always hated that, especially on Halloween I made it look good. We had made her scream and jump once. Anyways, my rambling, sorry bout that. When we were in about Fifth grade he had told me he wished that we were brothers, and we made a pact to be there for each other, whenever we needed it. No matter where we were, no matter the time. And well,...later that year, my parents had told me that his family had gotten in a car crash, and, well they passed on. I still hold that little boy in my heart; he was my first best friend, the one I trusted.
My life changed after that, I tried not to have another best friend; I didn't want Thomas to think that I had replaced him, I was mostly alone through out middle school. I walked home along the train tracks skipped rocks at the beach alone and stayed in my room a lot. My parents knew that his death was hard on me, because he was one of my only friends. When I had reached 7th grade my parents decided they wanted another kid. And that little baby was a girl, so I became the big brother to stick up and protect her. But I'll tell a bit more about her later. Right now this was when I started to get into Architecture; I started drawing, wanting to make a building, or maybe my own house in the memory of my best friend. I knew he'd love it, and I would never forget him. He would be with me, and I would be there for him, all the time. I'm trying my best to keep that pact. I know, how lame am I? For keeping something so long, well y'see that boy was my best friend and first, possibly last, outside the family. My dad and dog have been and always will be. Just like Thomas. That boy had impacted me so much, that's how important he is to me. Anyways, I started drawing buildings and just little things that I knew he'd like. At first of course I wasn’t any good at drawing, but I did get better, and my dad helped me figure a lot of things out. This was when I wanted to do really good in school so I could get into a really good college. And I tried, studied more than a kid would normally. 8th grade, my baby sister was finally in the picture, she was absolutely adorable. I loved her with all my heart, she healed the hole I had in my heart. And she's part of my inspiration, because she brought me back. When she would be sleeping, I'd sit in the room and talk to her, quietly of course. I tried to draw pictures of her while she slept, trying to get better at drawing. In 8th grade I started to kind of get back to the way I was. Still had no friends, the year went by in a breeze and I don't remember much, but that's also when I started to play the guitar.
Now to high school. Well first, my mom had gotten a job offer here in Sunset Beach, and so we moved into a nice house that overlooked the beach, it was a beautiful. And it gave me a ton of ideas. I sat in the big window we had that let in the sunlight, and let us see the beautiful world below us, and all around. My first two years in high school, were great. I started over, and made a great group of friends. We stayed friends for a long while, I don't have much to say about high school though. Sorry to skip that, I went to parties, drank, but not a whole lot. But my junior year was when I met my first and long term girlfriend. I had fallen in love with her over the years, her name was Grace Johnson. She meant everything to me, and we were together for about 5 years. My birthday was just never a good day for me. Was it coincidence? Or was it me? We were leaving a restaurant she had wanted to take me to for months, and of course waited for my birthday to take me. I loved it all, that day she told me she loved me. She wanted to wait for the right time to tell me. As I was waiting for the right time to tell her...that night, to ask her to marry me. We just so happened to walk through, some apparent "gang" territory, where they had almost beaten me to death, and they beat her, and raped her. Her wounds and everything, were really severe, she died later that night. I had a hard time getting over it. Well I still am.
I blamed myself every night, for her death. I should've protected her, done more. But to cope with it all I took counseling for a few years, and learned to play piano.
And got a temporary job as a waiter at a fine restaurant in town. I was also a substitute teacher at Cassadaga. The restaurant has good pay, and the tips are great. All the years in between then and now, are filled with counseling, pain, heartache, and more loneliness. I stuck with architecture as a way to make a lot of my pain go away, and when I couldn't think of anything more, I'd sit in my living room and play the piano. My heart and my love for the ones I have lost will always be with them, I can't change the hands of time. Although I wish I could. If it could have been me, and not them. And so now I live in my own apartment with my dog Batman.
ALIAS: Raine
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